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SkipBurns.com
Sunday, September 25, 2005



Remember Monica Lewinski. She's the girl who used to be able to buy gas for under a dollar a gallon in the Bill Clinton Administration.

Seems hard to believe that six years ago gas was cheap, we hadn't invaded anyone and if and when we fought a war we only paid for our side of it. FEMA meant something besides Federal Enemic Messed-up Agency, interest rates were dropping, inflation was non existent and the President was only embarrassed instead of being an embarassment.

Ever wonder whatever happened to the "Good Old Days"?

That's easy. They were bought up by Halliburton.


Posted by donburnshomepage at 10:46 PM EDT
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Wednesday, July 20, 2005




Shifting Sands:

First the president said he would fire anyone in his administration who disclosed the name of a CIA operative to the press.

Now he says that "if someone committed a crime they will no longer work in his administration". Of course that implies they will have to be convicted first, which will tke about two years.

After the conviction it will be "anyone convicted of a crime and sentenced to jail cannot work in the administration if they lose their final appeal (by which time the administration won't be there either).

Appears Carl Rove couldn't be safer if he were in the arms of Jesus.


Posted by donburnshomepage at 12:01 AM EDT
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Friday, June 24, 2005



President Cheney....whoops, I mean vice President Cheney.....has given us the lowdown on our imminent victory in Iraq.

Obviously he has the inside track on such things what with him thinking for the President, but he should take time to explain it to General Abizaid who is our chief honcho in Iraq and who seemed dumbstruck by the revelation. Maybe that's because the closer you get to the explosions the more personal they seem to become and Dick having been in hiding for the past four years is a bit out of touch.

As I've said before, the man needs to get out of the bunker more often. Take a walk without his helmet on, talk to real people for a change, go on vacation in Baghdad. Or, in the alternative he could become a fiction writer.


Posted by donburnshomepage at 10:50 PM EDT
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Monday, May 30, 2005



Had given the weblog stuff a respite in the hopes that nothing would irritate me enough to start it up again and lo and behold, the draft dodging vice president who has been in hiding most of the last four years has to open his mouth and insult my intelligence. So it's back to work I go.

It seems that because he was an expert at helping Halliburton Corp. make money on government contracts for military prisons he now considers himself an expert on prisoner abuse. This time he's taken on Amnesty International for criticizing the United States and it's treatment of POW's at Guantanamo Bay in Cuba. Whether AI is right or wrong in their allegations remains to be seen, but apparently Mr. Cheney has been in hiding so long he hasn't heard about Abu Grahib.

Obviously the man needs to get out more. Maybe read a newspaper. Talk to a friend if he can buy one. Walk his dog. Become a mortician...... Enlist?..... Something......anything?


Posted by donburnshomepage at 11:38 PM EDT
Updated: Monday, May 30, 2005 11:42 PM EDT
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Thursday, April 21, 2005



According to the news this morning the South Carolina Legislature has made cock fighting a felony. 'Bout time. It's a bit of a nasty sport (if you can call it that) to watch a couple of chickens peck each other to death.

At the same time they also decided to make wife beating a misdemeanor.

One of their congressmen explained to a critic that we just didn't understand the facts.

And the facts are: There are far more chicken fatalities in South Carolina every day than there are battered wives cases, so in an effort to lower the chicken mortality rate we raised chicken fights to a felony and lowered wife beatings to a misdeameanor. Perfectly logical.

It's just a matter of priorities.


Posted by donburnshomepage at 6:40 PM EDT
Updated: Friday, April 22, 2005 7:42 AM EDT
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Wednesday, April 20, 2005



Having mistakenly thought that the nation was in no great danger despite the Bush victory in November I'd lowered my guard and neglected this blog for the last month. And look what happens.

Tom Delay crawls out from under a rock and wants to remove the Supreme Court and replace it with Conservative Congressmen who know how to judge. After all, they made Tom their leader so they must be right.

His latest victim is Justice Anthony Kennedy, a moderate Reagan appointee to the court who has failed to make the appropriate court decisions according to Congressman Delay.

The Congressman wants to visit the part in the Constitution where "judges can only continue to serve so long as they serve with good behavior". Presumeably un-Delay decisions constitute bad behavior.

Considering the source and the ethics of the source we have seen this before. Mr. Delay should be thankful Congress doesn't play by the same rules (at least until he changes them). Then again, if he can remove justices from the Court, why not unqualified members of Congress and perhaps he should straighten out the President too. We'll just let Tom run the show and we can all go home and sleep with a revolver under our pillow.

Whoever said Joe McCarthy was dead and buried needs to go re-check the gravesite in Wisconsin.


Posted by donburnshomepage at 12:20 PM EDT
Updated: Wednesday, April 20, 2005 12:25 PM EDT
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Wednesday, March 23, 2005



With all of the problems in the world the press and the government seem hell bent on billing the case of a brain dead girl in Florida who purportedly wants to die as the main event.

Meanwhile a student goes on a killing spree in a school in Minnesota, more die in Iraq, the debt increases, the trade deficit increases, the price of gas increases, the amount of oil from Iraq decreases and more jobs go overseas. But these are the secondary stories. Go figure.

The smaller, cheaper, less intrusive government seems to be bigger, more expensive, and more intrusive than the one we got rid of and doesn't seem to be doing much right either.

So much for priorities.


Posted by donburnshomepage at 6:18 AM EST
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Wednesday, March 16, 2005



All this time we've been worried about what's going to happen to Social Security when the baby boomers hit and "lo and behold", the University of Illinois at Chicago up and saves us with a report.

According to the professors we aren't going to live as long as we thought we were for one simple reason. All our prosperity has translated into fat. We are eating ourselves to death at a rate that is going to reverse the longevity trend and subtract about five years from the lifespan at the rate we're going.

So "can the private accounts" and pass the feedbag. The more we get, the more we eat. The more we eat the quicker we're gone. The quicker we're gone the less we cost.

Sounds like a plan to me.


Posted by donburnshomepage at 9:31 PM EST
Updated: Wednesday, March 16, 2005 9:33 PM EST
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Thursday, March 10, 2005



I see in the news where it seems some fellow on trial for alledgedly knocking off his wife down in Arkansas has been sending love letters to a certain Ms. Murphy Smith from his jail cell. That is till prosecutors put a stop to it by issueing a subpeona for the infamous Ms. Smith to appear for the trial.

She appeared but didn't have much to say being she turned out to be a dog. A shih-tsu to be exact. Having one of my own I can speak to their independent nature, closed mouth attitude and sense of loyalty. A shih-tsu after all will not rat you out.

It takes a human for that sort of business. Preferably a guilty one.


Posted by donburnshomepage at 12:05 AM EST
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Wednesday, March 9, 2005



Looks like we're about to get some changes in the bankruptcy laws if the Republicans in Congress have their way .

According to the Democrats the new changes will help credit card companies, creditors and anybody else who is owed money to collect from people who don't have it by limiting their ability to shelter resources and assets they don't have to begin with.

For a change, the Republicans agree. They believe that like Jesus and the miracle of the loaves and fishes, they too can turn water to wine and create something from nothing. And for their first trick they are going to show how you can get blood out of a stone by just squeezing it a little harder.

My take is that more of nothin' is still nothin'.




Posted by donburnshomepage at 11:33 PM EST
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